Military Wives

The helpmates of the hero’s  that serve our country, Military Wives. The Santos’s have been married for 15 plus year.  A Perfect example of the scripture, With God all things are possible. Marriage is a beautiful thing. Keep praying and trusting God. Below are a few testimonies.

Hello,I am a military spouse of 9.5 years. As a former Reservist, I understand the call of duty'; however, it still gets frustrated when the 'call' must take precedence over family. On my husband's very first deployment, I couldn't keep myself together. Being overseas for the first time took some getting used to, but to do it alone w/ our 4 year old son w/o him was no cake walk. It seemed that when our marriage hit the worst of it, he had to go. I learned during his time away, that I didn't need to be 'independent', I just needed to depend on God. I had spent so much energy and time focusing on my husband and son, that God wasn't head of my life. I certainly remained in prayer throughout his deployment not just for his safety, but his mind. The men and women out there see a lot of stuff and the stress of being away from the family makes it extra hard. I encourage other wives out there that are having a hard time to really get down on your knees and seek God. Crying out to God bc you miss your spouse is ok. You can survive being w/o him/her for a little while or a long time. God sustains you; not your spouse. So, by allowing God to be number one in your life, your focus changes. You will find that relying on God is what's going to help; trusting God to keep your family safe will help. Prayer is key. When you're seeking God's face, the things that are thrown at you will not be as easy to give into. Don't get me wrong, Satan will tempt in anyway possible, so be on guard and prayed up.
A few tips that helped me are getting involved in ministry-not just to keep you busy, but to sharpen one another. Getting out w/ other women will help, but be careful w/ chatter. Some women (even in the church) like to dog men out when they get together. Build your man up! Always end the phone conversations pleasant EVEN if you've argued-and believe me there can be times when discussing things, arguments can arise. Encourage and thank your man when you speak to him. It's ok to let him know you miss him, but it helps him focus better on his job if you're not screaming/crying "COME HOME" when he physically cannot do anything about it. And lastly, when he returns do not feel ashamed that you're 'overdoing' it. Get a make over. Have a family night of course, but also plan a date night. Balloons, cake, posters, etc, are ok, but its the time together that counts. I pray that men or women who read these are encouraged. It takes some struggling for some to encourage others. God bless you.
 Cathy Cooley

I have been married to my husband for 18 years - his entire military career.
We married fresh out of college.  In the years we've been together, he has
been deployed anywhere from 3 - 18 months at any given time.  In the
beginning, it was so hard because we were just married with our first child,
and he was sent to Korea for 1 year.  By the grace of God, I had family.  I
prayed for him during our absence.  As we grew older, it seemed to get a
little easier and maybe it was because I put my faith in God to watch over
him.  As I was seeing families splitting up and separating around me, mine
stayed strong and never understood why until I was older.  Although, you had
the devil around you saying all sorts of things while we were apart, it
never deterred me...
We are blessed to be married, happily married, for 18 years - not too many
military couples or couples for that matter last that long.  He is retiring
this year, praise God!!!! 
For all of the military couples out there - don't let anyone tell you
anything different from what you heart believes!!! That is just jealousy -
you know misery loves company - don't fall into it.  Believe in your man
because trust me, he needs you - whether he shows you outright in the
beginning, it will come to pass in the future!!!!!
Put God first and He will show you the way!!! - He will show you who your
real friends are!!! 
Cynthia L. Patterson
May God bless you and keep you safe!!

When my husband first went of deployment it was very hard for all of us, because we just moved to Florida and didn't know anyone.  My mother would come to Florida to stay with us while my husband was on deployment.   At that time we had two girls, ages three and five.  He said he wasn't ready to leave us, but I tried to encourage him by telling him, we will be miss you too, we will be alright, and will be here when you return, all we need to do is put God first and continue to let Him direct us.  While he was away, I stayed very busy, even went to college.   I would receive letters from him just about every day, some two at a time.  It got to the point  that the mail man would tell me that my husband sure like to write.  But that was a way for him to show me that he miss us.  He went to sea duty back to back to back and you talking about a hard time, but God.. I always told him that things happen for a reason and we need to just go with it. It made our love even stronger for each other and made us appreciate each other more. Now he has retired (April 2007), our family is so close and do not regret the things that God put us through ( it was hard but we made it)  HE knows what's best for us... praise HIM.   Stay encourage and keep the faith Navy Wife 
God Bless,

I have been married to my Marine for 8 years.  We have been together for 10 years.  I have 2 kids ages 4 and 8. My husband has been deployed recently for one year.  This is the longest deployment we have endured. Being married to any man in the service is hard.  We have a marriage like no other. Civilian wives don't understand what we go through.  My family doesn't understand that I don't want to talk about what's going on across the waters.  I know my Hubby is Covered in the Blood of God Almighty.  Yes, we all have that time of doubt and worry but when that happens to me I start Praising and Lifting His name.  God always assures me through his word.  Don't fret over what the enemy and your flesh is trying to put in your head.  Just rest on God's word.  God did not give us a spirit of fear he gave us fruits of the spirit.  My favorite scripture is Isaiah 54:17  No weapon that is formed against me shall prosper........ To all the new and my season wives.  We have a sisterhood like no other.  Through our ups and downs of constant deployments military wives stick together. Some of my closest friends are military wives. We have to be proactive and give a listening ear to one another.  Stand on the Word and keep the enemy under your feet. Stay Blessed and May Heaven shine upon you.
LaWaun 

I wanted to take this time to also give encouragement to the other side of military life as a woman of God, wife, mother and service member.  Many times because we are so few in numbers both spiritually and naturally women of God in the military are overlooked, but we are here.  I am presently on my fifth deployment and my husband is home "holding down the fort" as he and I say.  I have not always been saved and therefore know both sides of the way of life in the military and know that without the Lord I don't know where I would be.  It is a challenge to be few in numbers but I know that with God, I am more than a conqueror and stand on that everyday as I deal with egos and prejudices (yes they are still out there) and separation from family. My prayer is that all service women will take a stand in the midst of sin and refuse to conform to this world, but be ye Holy for He is Holy.
  After this deployment my husband has asked me to leave the service which I will be doing (happily I might add), but I told the Lord that before I go I want to have victory over all of the emotions, conflicts, stresses, and discouragements that military life brings with it.  Some of them I have overcome already others I am still praying and fasting on, but through it all I know I will be a witness that is can be done and marvel at the fact that God in His infinite power is a keeper of those who want to be kept.  To all of my Sisters in Christ; wives of military men and active duty military women alike... Let's Be the Light that Sitteth on the Hill and Cannot be Hid. 
Love You,
Sis Tiquita

Hello, to everyone.  I am have really been blessed with your website.  I have been a military wife for the past 15 years and have been through good and bad times. But what I could say to other military wives hold fast to God’s unchanging hands.  I am on my second marriage to a military service member who is currently deployed. My last husband was deployed throughout the whole time we were married but I stayed prayed up and in God’s word and new that despite what goes on in my life God is my anchor.  After my divorce God saw fit to send me my first love and best friend and in this union we have grown spiritually together.  He is currently deployed again and it is rough ordeal but know that know that we as military wives have to be strong for our families.  Temptation is always going to be out there especially for military men but keep God first and keep fasting and praying and God will fight those battles for you.  I read “The Blessing” and keep saying that is me.  So, military wives especially the new ones know who you are and who’s you are and allow God to be the director in your life and your marriage.  Just as the song says that He would never put more on you than you could bear.  So, know that if He allows you to have it He knows the outcome.  Love God first and everything else would fall into place.  God Bless.  GO YE!!!!
Elizabeth D. Jackson

Hello, this is Nikki .  I just got finish reading some of the other emails that were sent, and I must say that they really inspired me. I went through my husband being unfaithful also, and I was ready to give up on him, because the thought of him sharing with another woman what he shares with me, just was not sitting right with me. We got passed it, but it took me awhile to trust him again. When he left for Iraq last year, I must say that the thought of him cheating on me again did enter my mind, but I had to let it go or I would not have been able to function. The good Lord has brought me and my family through alot, so I know that he will see us through this deployment. I could go on and on about the situations that the Lord our God has worked out for my family, but it would take a lifetime and then some. When I was ready to give up, He stepped right and told me that everything would be alright. My husband was troubled in his spirit and did not understand why the Lord was taking us through all of these changes, but I asked him why not? The Lord did not promise us that just because we have turned our lives over to him, that everything would be hunky dorey. As a matter of fact, it is the opposite. The devil knows that the Lord is getting ready to move in a big way and he is trying to attack our family, but I told my husband to hold on and keep the faith, and in the end, the Lord always wins. So, if I could give some advise to the new military wives out there who have not been through any of this, just hold on and keep the Lord first in your life and you can't go wrong. Just remember that our plans are not His plans and our thoughts are not His thoughts, so what ever you desire to do in life, you have to put it in His hands.

I've been thru my husband deploying and having to take care of the kids, bills, house, work a job, write him letters, keep everybody encouraged as well as yourself and without the Lord I know I wouldn't have made it........I would tell any wife, that in order to stain sane during these hard times, you must know God, I don't mean church alone but have a personal relationship with him and trust in him with all your heart, mind and soul.......Being apart of a church helps a lot, it's important that we be around people that can build us up and encourage us....and the Bible says "Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God" so when we're in hard times we must hear God's word and believe in it.....My husband deployed to Iraq not long after 9/11, he was their when the war broke out, he stayed for 12 months, I remember not hearing for him for 2 months, don't know if he's dead or alive, trying to stay encouraged and protect my kids from other kids saying " how you know your dad not dead, all I had during those times was God's words that "whatsoever you pray if you believe it that we shall receive it", all things are possible to him that believe, scripture just kept coming up out of me, I continued to be faithful in church because I knew that I needed to continue to hear the word of God, it gives you peace and it was hard but I thank God for the Holy Spirit that is my Comforter, all I had was my faith that God would bring my husband back safe and sound and he did just that........I have a lot I can say but I'll end now....  -Pamela Archangel 

I've been thru my husband deploying and having to take care of the kids, bills, house, work a job, write him letters, keep everybody encouraged as well as yourself and without the Lord I know I wouldn't have made it........I would tell any wife, that in order to stain sane during these hard times, you must know God, I don't mean church alone but have a personal relationship with him and trust in him with all your heart, mind and soul.......Being apart of a church helps a lot, it's important that we be around people that can build us up and encourage us....and the Bible says "Faith comes by hearing and hearing by the word of God" so when we're in hard times we must hear God's word and believe in it.....My husband deployed to Iraq not long after 9/11, he was their when the war broke out, he stayed for 12 months, I remember not hearing for him for 2 months, don't know if he's dead or alive, trying to stay encouraged and protect my kids from other kids saying " how you know your dad not dead, all I had during those times was God's words that "whatsoever you pray if you believe it that we shall receive it", all things are possible to him that believe, scripture just kept coming up out of me, I continued to be faithful in church because I knew that I needed to continue to hear the word of God, it gives you peace and it was hard but I thank God for the Holy Spirit that is my Comforter, all I had was my faith that God would bring my husband back safe and sound and he did just that........I have a lot I can say but I'll end now....  -Pamela Archangel 

I am a military wife and my husband is gone for months at a time on a regular basis. He is gone as I type this letter. He will come home this weekend and be gone again within the next two weeks. I am the mother of two children ages 2 and 6. So I can truly understand the stresses of being a military wife. Women ask me all the time "how do you do it" and I tell them its almost like being a single parent with someone paying all my bills and just when I get too lonely my husband comes. But the devils a liar. Wether my husband is here or there he is still mine. Our marriage has really suffered. My husband has committed adultery a number of times, but God still has me here. And I am happy to be here. God is showing me that I can still trust even when we are apart. Because you see, we have no control over man, but we have authority over the enemy. And once I learned and understood that, my marriage began to operate under the principles that God intended it to. Proverbs tells us that the eyes of a man are never satisfied, so we must pray and bind up temptation that arises in our husbands lives. Paul told us that it is not good for a man and wife to separate it for fasting and praying or it allows the devil to come in and tempt us. So since we already know this because of what the word has told us, we should already plead the blood of Jesus over the situation. There is power in the blood of Jesus. The blood of Jesus works miracles. I also had to realize that my husband didn't owe me anything. He owes it all to God. He sinned and broke relationship with God and he must answer to God. I don't have a heaven or hell to put him in. But God. I also had to learn to not look at my husband as the enemy, but to begin to speak to those spirits working in them and put them in their place. Has it been a easy road, no, but God. It is not easy being a military wife. We have so many things on us and at times it seems as if we are doing them all alone, but God is right there giving us strength all the way. Another thing I had to learn is that no matter how tired and wore out I was or am, I can not take it out on my children. It is so easy to get drained taking care of the kids, but think of those women out there who don't have a husband that is coming back in a few months. Or those women who don't have that support of a husband and authority figure in the home. There are always so many more complaints than ours, but what we can do is be thankful for where God has us. Everything he does is good. Our lives are in the hands of the potter and He don't create no junk. I look forward to times that my husband is gone. It gives me an opportunity to grow in Christ. I make it appoint that every time he leaves he comes home to a new woman. A woman who is yet a little more mature in Christ. After all Proverbs 31 tells us that a woman who fears the Lord shall be praised. It is hard being married to a man in the military. All you here about is the cheating and the time away. But God is so much greater than that curse. Through prayer and fasting for our husbands they can have and use the good sense that God gave them. And don't give up on your husband because he has committed adultery. Don't get me wrong the decision is yours, but God can restore anything he so desires. Each time I caught my husband cheating I used to say that sexual immorality is a get out of marriage free card. But God had other plans for me. He said stay and be still. Let no man separate what I put together, not even you. Then he broke it down a little more and said "who are you to question what I have restored, when I restored in the past did you hear anyone say "Lord, is this for real, can I trust this", No it was finished” So, if God has finished a work, why do we try to dig up old bones. I used to ask the question - How can you live with the person who has hurt you the most? And God said with meekness, love and kindness, remembering God as your Savior, Deliverer, Strong-Tower, and just as I have saved you I can save them. Set aside pride and put your trust in me.
We always want to look to man for what we need, but God is our everything. But to get back on the subject: Military wives be strong and know that God is always right there. We have to be strong enough to believe that no matter what it looks like God is in control and we have to begin to know God for all the many, many, many things that He is and put Him first in our lives. Using every opportunity to grow close to Him. So don' t look at your husbands being gone as a time of separation, but look at it as a time of refreshing. To refresh your spirit and which in turn will refresh your marriage. I love my husband and it is only because I looked past my pride and sought God. And yes he is still working on me, allowing me to see myself everyday, a continuous work-in-progress. I pray that this has helped in some kind of way. I could not really write out what I was thinking in my heart, but I pray that even through this you can hear my heart. I love you and God Bless You.
Kizzy  

         Hello to everyone! I would to share my story as a military wife dealing with deployments. My husband has been in the Army for 10 years in September and I have been through 8 deployments with him and he is getting ready to make his third to Iraq.    We have had 2 miscarriages, one child to pass and have one child living (she will be 3 in April). Coping with his deployments and dealing with the lost and have a child alone is very hard for any women to deal with. I pray all day long. I also talk to other young new military wives that want to give up on their husbands just after a few weeks of their deployment. My word of encouragement to them is to ALWAYS put God first. Pray together with your husband, family and friends and he will see you through.    Those are the words I live by and stand by very proud to pass them on to anyone that is always in the need for prayer. With out him there will be no us. He is our father and he will see us through.
Monica Ft. Campbell, Ky Proud Military Wife For 10 yrs