The death of a child is a hard thing to bare. Be it miscarriage, stillborn, SID, homicide or any other kind of illness the child may have passed away from. It is one of the most painful occurrences life can bring. Theses tragic deaths leave parents with shattered dreams, empty arms, and deep pain. Along with a lot of unanswered questions. The feelings of guilt, rage, anger and disappointment are valid. Don’t judge yourself because of them, having theses feelings doesn’t mean you are losing your mind or that you are emotionally unstable. Cry as much as you need to, and never say sorry for one tear to anyone. Tears are healthy, and it helps release the pain. Remember if you have other children they are also grieving too and need to express their feelings as well. If you are not able to give your children the support they need, call a close friend or a family member or someone form your church and explain to them what’s going on and see if one of them will be willing to offer support for the children.
Don’t be surprised if your partner grieves differently. Each person deals with things in their own way. Please try to be patient and kind with one another. Although it’s hard to be sensitive to each other feelings at this time, it will really be helpful. The lost of any love one especially your child will cause your sleeping, eating, and attitude to change. Make sure to pray and trust God. There is no need to keep beating your self up asking what did you do wrong, when you come up with the same answer nothing.
Although it feels like you can’t make it through this hurtful, difficult, time. Just trust in God, and pray everyday. Get you a journal and write every feeling you have down. It doesn’t matter if you lost a child 2 years ago 5 years ago it’s still your child and he/she/or them will forever be in your heart. Trust me I lost 2 and I didn’t think I would make it through, but I did. With the help of God, my spouse, my children, friends and family.